I am 48 years old and was just diagnosed a couple of months ago. I completely understand your struggles and grief. I quite often ask myself “what if I had been diagnosed as a child, or even a couple of decades ago” and am bitter towards my parents, doctors, and really anyone throughout my life who I sought help from that didn’t give it to me.
Instead of playing the “blame game”, I am attempting, with the help of a counsellor, to move forward instead of looking back. This is not an easy road to take, what with trying to learn how to manage my ADD and personal life, but I do feel tiny little baby steps of accomplishment sometimes.
Good luck to you, Paige, I hope you continue to update us.