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I realize this is an old post, however I wanted to let you know there is hope for you. You have described me almost to a T, and I feel your confusion and anguish.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) was my lifesaver 3 years ago. My therapist was able to guide me to recognize where I was ‘going wrong’ so to speak, in my social interactions, and it also taught me a lot about myself and how I ruined so many relationships throughout my life without meaning to. I too thought I was being supportive, helpful, etc. instead I was overstepping so many boundaries that I didn’t recognize were there, and alienated people around me.
You are extremely insightful and intelligent, as I can see from your post, and your ability to express yourself in writing. Find a therapist who specializes in CBT, preferably he or she will also have experience with ADHD. Shop around until you find a good fit, if need be. It’s intensive, and a lot of work, but I know you are motivated to make a change for the better for yourself 🙂 … I may have burned many bridges in my past, and am still dealing with that in some cases, but CBT has enabled me to connect to myself and also others and start fresh. I wish I could go back and fix things with my family (especially by children), but I know now that I’ll have to let them come to me on their terms, when they feel they can trust me once again, instead of me forcing my newfound wisdom on them.
You can do this! I’m so glad I stumbled across your post, it popped up while I was searching for info on dextroamphetamine lol… Karma I suppose, so I could reach out to you ~
Peace, and good luck!