If you are working effectively all week and getting reasonable pay, can you not hire someone to help on the occasional weekend? Having another person to work alongside is quite galvanising. And once you have broken the back of the mess it is quite easy to maintain for some time.
If you cannot cope alone, you cannot. It is not a moral failing, just a glitch in the brain, a glitch we all have if we’re here.
It’s getting started that is so hard – where to begin? Confusion reigns. I go from room to room, starting in twenty places at once, and only creating more chaos.
I spend hour after hour not washing the dishes because everything else is more interesting. Remember, we have interest-based brains, and housework is not fascinating, it is repetitive and tedious.
But we thrash ourselves for not washing the dishes, then we get confused (because it is so easy to do the dishes) and depressed (we’re such a secret slob, if they only knew!), that we take the couch route, which is a hiding-place.
I suggest you move your couch outside into the sunshine and list all the things that you did manage to do. You got up, you ate something, you brushed your teeth, you took out the garbage, you learned something new on Youtube, you dreamed about designing a house, you answered the phone. When you list absolutely everything, you will find you did quite a lot. But what you did may not fit societal norms of the good housekeeper.
OKay, now get up and wash one dish!