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We have dealt with this since our son- now 12- was 2 or 3. We argued over approaches- did he need more discipline? Understanding and a hug? He knew what he was doing was wrong. Our choice was to use language that expresses clearly our upset with the action/ behavior. While balancing this with messages of pride and love – usually at times other than the explosive incident. Over and over for years. I am happy to report that this behavior is slowly fading. Read all you can. Watch your tone of voice, and of course, make sure there are no other underlying issues that may be causing this behavior. These are super- sensitive children ands what we may perceive as a small issue to them is monumental. It’s a humbling learning curve for parents.