Reply To: If you could go back in time and do it all over again, would you?

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#83932
hayes
Participant

I’m the ADD partner – diagnosed 16 years ago at age 35. We have had lots of struggles – even coming close to the brink. I thought my struggles were merely attention-related; I thought I could ‘fix this ADD thing’ with just meds. What I didn’t realize was many of the other compounding things that go with it. It took my wife talking about separation to realize that meds won’t work without the assistance of a solid therapeutic relationship.

I found a really good therapist a year ago, and it’s made a huge difference. As people connected to this profession (I’m a HS teacher, my wife a therapist), we were able to see the long goal here. We do love each other, and have a wonderful family (son 20, daughter 16). It’s hard work – or I should say, I’M HARD WORK. But we’re in a much better place, looking to celebrate 25 yrs married this June.

I’m not sure if she’d do it all over again. But I’m sure grateful that she loves me enough to stay enoug. I know I’d do it all over again – she’s so worth it. I’d like to think those of us with ADD are worth it, too. But we have to put in the work so our partners feel that THEY are worth it. It sure if this helps – but just wanted to give a perspective from ‘the other side’. Thanks for reading…