Reply To: Son's Birthday

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My heart goes out to you, your wife, and son. The date of your post tells me that his birthday party has passed. I hope it went well. It’s hard to know what is right in this situation. As a 30 yr. teacher (and mom of grown children) I can tell you I’ve seen many birthday party “challenges”. One thing I’ve learned is that kids usually know what they would like to happen and who they might like to spend time with on any special occasion. Most families try to include the whole class, just to be “fair” but kids party radars always seem to know who the b-day child really wants to have come and even without the ADD-ADHD socializing element, hurt feelings often abound. My hope for your family is that your guy finds one or two good friends that he can bond with and that they become part of his support system. Most of us are lucky if we have even one true friend in our life-no matter our age! I love that you had the idea about your baseball team being invited but I’d add this suggestion that would help deflate the stress of “party” and “who’s going to be there”. I’d ask the coach or team mom (I remember the days!) if you could bring a special birthday treat to celebrate your sons b-day with the team after game. This would work even if the birthday has passed-you could still do this, it could be a belated event, bring cupcakes (so much easier than cake and not as serious) or send them for ice cream from the snack shack, and the right drinks. Buy a few balloons but don’t go crazy just enough to make it a party-keep it short and sweet! Have the team coach or team mom start the Happy Birthday song. After they eat, let your son pass out small baseball-theme favors (packs of b-ball cards, sunflower seeds, bubblegum, or small candies) at the end. If you make up a small “card” to put in the bag it could say something like “Thanks for celebrating my birthday-Go “Dodgers”(team name). Keep it simple and I think your son might enjoy making others feel special on his day.