Reply To: ADD Man + ADD Woman = Anything?

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Adults Relationships ADD Man + ADD Woman = Anything? Reply To: ADD Man + ADD Woman = Anything?

#79004
andrew.n.hannah1
Participant

Wow! A subject I have something pretty positive to say about my experience dealing with this. I’m a classic case with failed relationships marriage etc. Two years ago I had a relationship with someone I really cared about end for the second time, once I. High school and again 24 years later. I decided to give the online dating thing a shot. I chatted with a lot of people went on a date or two and one night came across a profile of a woman and after reading it I had two thoughts. 1. Wow she kinda sounds like the fun kinda crazy I tend to like, I need to fully vet this one and make sure she is mostly fun and not actually crazy and 2. She absolutely has to have ADHD with that profile. Now I know the bad kinda crazy and I’ve had more than my fill so that’s a deal breaker but I’ve never looked at a woman and thought ADHD and never dated someone from our tribe.
It turned out that she wasn’t diagnosed And she wasn’t the Badd kind of crazy either but she was a blast to be around. Fast forward 6 months and she got her diagnosis. It was really great for her As you can imagine it explains so much particularly when you’re in your late thirties. So now I’m officially dating A woman with ADHD. We’ve been dating for 2 years now. like some of the other answers Most of the time it’s great. sometimes it’s like having the other half of your brain in the room. All of those ADHD related difficulties Yup we both have them which means that neither one of us can get to Upset about them. Feeling a little bit of impulse control problems With keeping your mouth shut So you don’t make dumb or obtuse comments Not a problem At all she was probly thinking the same thing anyway better yet she will say something worse which is even funnier. Having some motivation issues with cleaning also not a Problem we try to alternate the timing of our most difficult symptoms But our song is your mess is mine by Vance Joy. The relationship lime any other has ups and downs, it ebbs and flows but the level of connection and understanding is on a level I have never experienced and it’s a whole lot of fun. I’m not sure finding a partner with ADHD is the ultimate or the best answer but the best advice I’ve ever gotten about finding a spouse when you have ADHD is to fi d a spouse that you can truly laugh with. Sometimes the tendency is to find a planner or a therapist type or a motherly type and those usually end j. Disaster. You can pay for a life coach a therapist even someone to help keep you accountable and on track but you can’t buy someone who will laugh with you through all your ADHD quirks. Best of luck