Hi funky, I have a couple bits to offer and I hope something helps and I wish you the best. As for the family, try googling something like “why does family suck” and you will at least find you are not alone and a good many people do not like their family. I definitely agree with the others that you should get a proper diagnosis, the right medicine, and good counseling or coaching. If you have adhd you need it all. I have found it better not to disclose or talk about being adhd unless it is someone that really cares about you. Keep in mind that it is a mental disorder and many people can be quite hurtful about that. It is a tough process to get a prescription for the most effective meds because they are very abusable. Use your energy to learn all you can it is a long process but people often report “life changing” benefits from the meds. The counseling is a must because you need to learn how to do things in your new normal world. You are worth the trouble so go for it.