When you say you’ve recently discovered ADHD, does that mean you have a diagnosis or a strong hunch? (I’m in the hunch category but I’ve talked to plenty of people that have been diagnosed, and that sure sound a lot like me.) I ask not to pry but to understand.
Also, have you talked to your kids about this? There are books that might better explain this to them if they don’t believe you. I mentioned to my wife that I thought I was ADHD and she didn’t believe me at first. Then I went to a CHADD meeting and came back and told her I met a lot of people that are just like me. Given that everyone in my family knows I’m just a bit quirky she started paying attention. My point is once they understand what you’re going through, and that is not easy, they might better see, understand, accept you for who you are.
Best of luck.