Reply To: Anger at surprises- are we dating ? Confused

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Penny Williams
Keymaster

People with ADHD can be very sensitive. She likely felt the gift of an organization tool was a negative statement about her lack of organization. She read an insult into it, even if you never had that intention or thought.

There’s also something called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSJ) that is a common aspect of ADHD. I think if you read these articles about it you will see a lot of your friend in it (I realized it explained a lot about my own son, and my undiagnosed husband):

How ADHD Ignites Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

The Fear of Failure Is Real — and Profound

I would assume you’re safe with gifts that are just an interest of hers and not a tool to improve something, although that’s an unknown.

Penny
ADDitude Community Moderator, Author & Mentor on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism