I understand your uncertainty about getting a diagnosis. A couple of things to consider are whether it might be easier now rather than later to get a diagnosis, even if you don’t do anything else differently at the moment. Perimenopause and menopause seem to exacerbate symptoms for some women (they did for me), and if you then change your mind about medication, you would not need to go through the diagnosis steps.
Also, you wrote, “I’ve learned to deal with my issues somewhat.” First, that’s really terrific and shows a lot of insight and persistence on your part. But if there is a chance that the “somewhat” could be changed to something better with a diagnosis, it might be worth it?
It would also be a vote of confidence for your child that having a diagnosis is not something to avoid. (And maybe (?) make things easier for you if it makes your husband more at ease.)