Is there any way we can change the title of this post but keep the content? It’s not so pessimistic anymore. Thank you for sharing your insights with me. You explain things very well and with creative, vivid story lines. I’ve been ADHD and Dyslexic since my earliest memory. All of my elementary school teachers tried to help me but my mom could not accept the idea that I have a “learning disability.” She was too proud “Your father is a surgeon and I’m a chemist, it’s impossible for you to be stupid!” Even now, she cannot accept my ADHD and Dyslexia but can admit that I’m a good artist. I didn’t know the term “ADHD” or “Dyslexia” when I was a child but I just knew I was very different from other children. I was always day dreaming in the day time but very hyper at night, jumping on the bed at 3am, drawing or creating stories when everyone else was sleeping. I could not read easily unless I memorize the word as an image. I could not understand school work or daily life tasks like tying my shoes unless I create a story. Everything have to be connected with metaphors in order for me to get it even now. I felt very behind and dumb. Even my so called childhood friends teased me and said I cannot read and that I just pretended to read. I found out that I have ADHD and Dyslexia 3 years ago and everything suddenly make so much sense. I started crying but out of happiness, knowing that there is a name behind all this and I’m really not alone.
I feel that I have trouble reading mainly because I cannot picture certain words in my brain and then I get stuck or I misread the word by connecting it to something else in my memory. I misread and mispell a lot of words especially if they look similar. Today, I caught myself making mistakes with “any” “and” “her” “how.” “notice” “notify” “ryan” “cry” things like that. I have a habit of using “thing” a lot when I talk because I cannot retrive the word quickly. Numbers can also be torture because my brain automatically flipped them in all directions. Sometimes concentration is a factor too, it gets worse when there are distractions. I carry a Bose noise cancelling headphones with me all the times but it’s not always effective with city life and open office environments. Music helps a lot. I enjoy British rock (big Beatles, Oasis, Liam, Noel Gallagher, Babyshambles, The Libertines, Pete Doherty, Muse, Radiohead fan) and classical music. Nowadays, I use google to correct my spelling and writing. I have to learn excel for my job and I did it all alone. I try to make sense of everything by using visual images in my brain. I Try to understand the spreadsheet and its elements by capturing it in my own way with images in my mind. I think I’m doing well with the excel even though it’s difficult because my manager and boss always gave me priority work and trust that I can do it.
It’s a challenge to be around most people because I get bored easily and I can be talking about many different things in 5 minutes. They get tired trying to catch up with me. The Additude site is very helpful. I feel “Aha” moments almost everyday when I read the articles or people’s personal stories. I want to share my most recent poem that I wrote for the 2017 Holiday.
My wish ascent to the winter sky and cross over
The snow falls down, memories piled up in my heart
Carried by the wind to the joys of tomorrow
My projected dream is colored by
this enchanted scenery
Looking to the sky,
stars twinkle and sing
Holiday lights illuminate our paths,
onto the new year
I have a question about our brains and the prefrontal lobes but I should really log off now. I still have to follow a typical 9-5 routine and should eat dinner. Tomorrow is finally Friday and I can really be myself on the weekends!
Thank you for reading and your kindness! I really appreciate it!