Reply To: Difficult because no background

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Adults Difficult because no background Reply To: Difficult because no background


Before my husband and I got married we asked each other if there was any health issues (physical mental etc) that we had or our families had. We both fully disclosed everything we knew. If your husband didn’t I’d say there are two reasons, either you never asked or he was ashamed. I personally wouldn’t be angry with him if it was something that neither of you thought to bring up. He may have not thought it was relevant or a big deal. If you did ask and he lied (didn’t give relevant information) I think I would also be very hurt, because he should have trusted you. However, you need to understand that for some people, especially men, feeling imperfect, is a really hard thing for them to come to terms with. He may have been teased as a child or made to feel embarrassed by family. I think you should discuss it with him and try to find the route of why he didn’t tell you and explain to him that your love is unconditional but that you do need him to be unfront and honest with you so that you can fully trust him.