I had this exact experience. I’m 40 years old and was quasi-diagnosed with inattentive ADHD a couple of years ago. I had no idea that I had this issue until my manager came to me about some careless mistakes that I made at work. So I googled ‘careless mistakes at work’. ADHD repeatedly came up, but I ignored that for a while. Finally, I decided to read about it, and it made me laugh, because the description was me to a tee. All these seemingly disparate parts of my life suddenly came together like pieces of a puzzle. I couldn’t believe it. The problem was- I had been a straight A student in school and never had any behavioral or learning issues, so the psychiatrist that I visited initially said that there’s no way that I could have ADHD and that I must have anxiety.
I went to another office- a counseling clinic. I was more interested in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy than medication. I have a clinical assessment performed and then was assigned to a social worker for counseling. It has been great. Over a period of two years, we have met 2x’s/month. I have learned so much about myself: why I do the things I do, what systems work best for me and why, why certain things don’t work, etc. I have been able to accomplish so much more at work and improve my relationships with others by actually listening to them instead of zoning out all the time. It’s still very much a work in progress, but I’m happy where I am. Now we’re reducing our meetings to once/month. I have not taken any medication, and I don’t think I need it really. It does take finding someone who will look at your symptoms and help you with those. Many people around me don’t really believe that I have ADHD, because I’m pretty high functioning and since my job is pretty autonomous and I live by myself, my symptoms don’t negatively impact other people that much. I finally have just said, it doesn’t matter what you call it, I have these particular issues and I’m working on resolving them.