If I were you I would go to a psychiatrist, not to a psychologist. I was recently diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 34. I found a psychiatrist that my friend recommended. Before I went to see him, I did some extensive research to figure out what exactly was wrong with me. It never occurred to me that I might have ADHD, despite many people in my family having it. I have had a successful career, master’s degree, 4.0 GPA, etc. In order to accomplish all those things, however, I have killed myself my entire life to succeed. I’ve always felt that I worked 10xs as a hard as others to accomplish the same thing.
I found out that have the inattentive type of ADHD, which also was causing me anxiety and constantly feeling overwhelmed. I also was extremely irritable and angry at my family all the time. I went to the doctor, presented my case to him, gave countless examples dating back to childhood that would “prove” I have ADHD. He suggested we start on a stimulant because you will notice the results pretty quickly. After a month of taking medication, I had zero outbursts and I seriously felt better than I had felt in years. My messy house didn’t overwhelm me. I didn’t get annoyed when my kids made messes. It was like I was a new, even-keeled person!
I really hope you can find someone who will hear your story and help you! Your life will be drastically different! Good luck