I relate to your post with a non-ADD 13 year old, and a sever ADHD 9 year old and both myself and my husband have ADD- which makes for a chaotic household. I am by far the most “dysfunctional” of the three of us, and my older son just watches it all happen – poor guy. My strategy has been “oh well.” Oh well if my youngest hasn’t showered in 9 days- oh well if he’s not wearing socks, or has on two different socks, oh well if its 10:02 and they’re not in bed yet because I’m too busy blogging- oh well if we are late everywhere we need to be, every time. Oh well if their homework is in a ball at the bottom of their back pack or there’s ice creamed melted onto the couch, or my car is filled with take-out garbage or I haven’t changed the sheets in over two months, or a single kitchen cupboard can house both boxed food, coffee cups, legal documents, modeling clay and random greeting cards that may or may not get used, or if the refrigerator looks like a bomb went off in it and no one can find what they’re looking for most of the time….I’m not saying I’m happy about it, or that I don’t try to get it together as often as I can- but I’m not going to let it get to me. I love my kids, they eat well, they have friends, they’re clothed sufficiently for the weather, I spend time with them, I’m interested in their life and we never fight because when things go wrong it’s never anything worth fighting over. They are doing the best they can and so are we. Life’s not perfect but- oh well.