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I have chronic migraines. In the past I’ve found it really hard to explain to people, previous roommates in particular, my condition. The invisibility of it makes it hard for them to comprehend. And I understand it’s difficult for people to understand, BUT a good friend makes an effort to understand and will show empathy and compassion even when they don’t fully understand it. Your roommate lacks both. She seems toxic.
It’s hard to let even toxic people go if they have been in your life for a long time, but it’s important to set up healthy boundaries so that their negative influences don’t impact your self esteem. You should be there to uplift your friend, just as your friend should be there to uplift you.