Have you thought about asking the psychiatrist about family counseling? Family counseling was brought up when my son started counseling when he was 5 for anxiety related issues. It taught parents techniques and strategies that would work with the child. It taught me how to help him cope with certain situations; how to handle meltdowns; and also how to identify attention-seeking behaviors.
It also really helped me understand my son’s diagnosis, and that understanding brought a certain level of clarity to why he did the things he did. All of it wasn’t always great fun. There were a few attention seeking behaviors that our counselor picked up on immediately that she said I was encouraging by my reaction to the behavior. But it really helped and I think it improved our relationship.