For some reason (hey could it be the ADD???) I missed your post. Big sympathy! It sounds very tricky and I too share the discomfort of being positioned exactly where everyone else can see what I’m doing but I can’t see them. Yuk. Lack of privacy is a whole extra stressor. I also get the “too tired to do anything else” feeling and I’m impressed that you still keep up your dance classes as I’ve dropped nearly all my creative and social activities – especially weekday ones – I just want to completely blank out when I go home. So I feel I’m wasting my life completely – another stressor. And – big, big hate – when many similar things land on my desk at once! Similar but not identical. YUK. I also can’t prioritise – I have to do each one when it lands – and people keep coming round to see if I’ve finished…:(((((
Having read all the way down the thread, nodding my head and wanting to hug everybody better, I’ve come to the conclusion that the only thing we can do is dig an escape tunnel. It’s just not going to work for us. Fighting against so much pressure and distraction simply to get our normal jobs done is all wrong. Imagine being a surgeon with a hand tremor who has to concentrate on keeping their hand still all the way through an operation! Aren’t we basically doing the same thing?
I haven’t yet found where my tunnel should lead but I’ve dug the first few spadefuls and am mulling quietly over its direction.
I have to find Privacy. Peace. Space. Seclusion. Control. Meaning. Those are my top six but there are probably lots of sub-needs too. I have the inattentive brand rather than the hyperactivity so being able to quietly focus is paramount.
I don’t know if this would work for everyone but I’m going to let myself think of this job as simply an enabler to an acceptable one. However, I recognise that it’s important to take back a bit of control so I’ll give myself a time limit and save like crazy. Otherwise I’ll be stuck hopelessly on this bumpy ride forever.
Big hugs xxx