My son is very interested in music, but we knew band would not be a good fit for him, due to the volume of sound in a fairly small space (and the chaotic sound of kids learning instruments). For him, that would feel like an assault. We learned in middle school that he can’t do school pep rallies either. He was not willing to take chorus class in middle school either, I believe for the same reasons.
It may be that a group band class is not a good fit for her.
Here’s more on sensory overload:
And a personal story you may relate to:
ADDitude Community Moderator, Author & Mentor on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism