Reply To: 20 years of treatment failure: is there hope?

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<sigh> I guess I could watch this a third time. He does not answer my main problem. Hours at a time disappear inexplicably, without my being able to account for them. I took 5 hours to make a simple rice-and-red-lentil one-pot dish last night. Should have taken less than an hour. As a result, I was up until 2 AM; my target bedtime was 11:00. I cannot tell you what I did for most of that time; I do not know what happened during those hours. Perhaps I was abducted by aliens; how would I know?

On a typical day, I will be getting my shoes on to walk out the door, a task that takes 3 minutes, and suddenly it’s 15 minutes later, and I don’t know why. It is like this all day long, every day. Time just disappears.

But it doesn’t. I know I am getting distracted into doing this and that and the other, responding to needs in the moment, there is some recollection when I really think about it. But the distractability and impulsivity are so extreme that I can’t really stop it and I should be in the shower right now instead I’m typing this. See what I mean? All these tips and tricks and principles require a certain amount of focus and ability to stay on task that I just don’t have to begin with. The basic brain function necessary to even apply all this great stuff is just not there. So I’m stuck.

It’s 10:20 right now and I intended to be done with my shower, now I may be late for work. I knew I should have stopped typing, but I COULD NOT STOP. That’s how it works.