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My son does this as well. He doesn’t feel the need to be “groomed” but does pick at and further destroy EVERYTHING (he’s almost 15).
Several years ago, a friend suggested Natural Calm, which is a powdered magnesium supplement. She said it helps with that. And it really did help a great deal, when he would take it. I’ve struggled to get him to drink it the last couple years unfortunately. It does seem to need to be this powdered formulation. Comes in several flavors and gets mixed in water or juice.
ADDitude Community Moderator, Author & Mentor on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism