I know the school year is over, and hope that next year is different for you and your son, but I wanted to comment on a couple of things. My son also felt like his teacher was always on him – and I felt the same way. His behavior chart that came home every day often had notes that I considered very negative and overly picky — like if his goal was to not make noises in class (a big struggle for him), if he made one noise there would be a comment about it, but on the days that he didn’t make noises at all, she didn’t acknowledge what a big deal that was for him. I noticed that when I began directly checking in with her and communicating often (almost daily via email), this shifted — she began to acknowledge the successes as well as the difficulties.
I would also definitely suggest getting his ADHD/ODD acknowledged in his IEP, with specific goals around it.