Reply To: New to dating a guy with ADHD – Need advice

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#50291
morena26
Participant

First off thank you all for your input, they all help (even the not so positive ones) but specially THANK YOU to AnneHW and mindyallison for you positive and insightful posts. I couldn’t agree with you more! I have been married twice and divorced twice to two guys that did not have ADHD, one mentally abused me and the other one just left because he wanted to fish the rest of his life! I can honestly say that I have never been happier than I am right now with my new guy and I look forward to spending more time with him and understanding him better.

I wholeheartedly agree that it is VERY important that I don’t expect for him to change but to accept him how he is instead and knowing what I can and cannot live with (believe me I know that VERY clearly). We had some bumps at the beginning of our relationship where he would look absent when I was talking to him and that would bug me; now I understand that it is not that he doesn’t care but rather that his brain went somewhere else and now he’s working on focusing. I take these things with a sense of humor now and tell him “Ok, let me know when you are back” and give him a kiss and usually that brings him back! 🙂

Like AnneHM and mindiallison say, we ALL (ADHS, ADD and non-ADHD) have our own issues. I am willing to accept his and the only reason why I asked for input here is because I wanted to understand him better since I am new to all this. I am now a more patient person and take life not so seriously because of him and that has actually made me a bit happier.

To all those people that tell me to “RUN” I also appreciate your input because I know you come from a good place from your experience, but I will not run! I love this man, he makes me extremely happy and I am going to be there for him as much as he is there for me.

Once again… THANK YOU!!