I have no words of wisdom. I am feeling much like you do on some days. But am training myself to repeat over and over “he is now my child, I love him, He depends on me to help him. He does NOT want to disappoint me and his reactions are out of the same frustrations I am feeling. I need to help him and I need to become smarter than this ADHD to do so” And it hasn’t been a magic wand but it has helped me keep perspective toward the fact that I was awarded guardianship of this child because the courts saw me as being the most capable of dealing with these issues. Was I starry eyed and no where near prepared to deal with fact that no, in fact, ADHD, LD and PTSD cannot be “healed” by a stable environment, love and structure??? This is why I am here. Immersing myself in the wisdom of others who have ideas and ways to deal with, look at, try new things and adapt…adapt and adapt some more. As confusing and frustrating as it is for us, imagine living in the brain of a child where nothing seems attainable, disappointment from people you love happens daily and peers hold you at arms length. When my frustration level is rising I try, not always successfully I add, to look at him fully and say “he did not ask to be born with this, he deserves every ounce of love and patience I can dredge up and every single moment I can devote to finding ways to help us all learn and cope with this baffling disorder” Peace be with you, my dear. I feel every bit of frustration and confusion you feel. Be kind to yourself and know this isnt easy, but be sure to note every smile and giggle….those are triumphs. Take them as they come and hold em near and dear.