I’m on board with this too. I think a lot of it has to do with insecurities that come along with ADHD. I was diagnosed when I was 9 years old; I’m 36 now. My parents understand I have it, but my mom has always made it sound like she thinks I’m self absorbed when I worry that people are talking about me. Her favorite saying is “it’s not always about you Lauren.” I think that was my first insight into the insecurities that manifest alongside ADHD. While the motivation for me thinking those things isn’t because I’m super self involved but rather it comes from a place of insecurity, and uncertainty.
I’ve been lucky I have a wonderful family, and loving, understanding friends who have been with me through everything. They’ve learned, as I have, about how to handle, and not to handle certain situations. I think in this case, letting your husband cool off before approaching him about his responses is best. I also agree finding someone for him to talk to is a good idea; even if it means driving to a big city a couple hours away, once or twice a month.