This reply was originally posted by user najn in ADDitude’s now-retired community.
I have been in a similar place. I was unable to control my son, and he also had a counselor coming to my place for a year and he was in a program for three months. It all seemed to work while the professionals were handling it, but as soon as I was left to my own resources, things would go upside down again.
I turned out to have depression, anxiety, and ADD. No wonder it was so difficult to be consistent with discipline for my son. I also lost control and yelled and other nasty behaviors that I had to work on. It’s like you have to educate your son but also educate yourself to be the parent you need to be. It’s tough and we will never be perfect, but keep trying.
It took until my son was 18 but he started doing what he has to do on his own for things that I always struggled to get him doing. Physical activity is a different matter. My son only likes video games and other screen entertainment. Again, it’s work in progress. He is 23 now and he got his learners drivers license, and he is more interested in finding a job and doing a good job when he is called to work. Just keep believing in him, and I know it’s more difficult, but also keep believing in yourself and trying to do just a little better every day.