Reply To: When I can’t stand anyone at work, am I the problem?

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Adults Relationships When I can’t stand anyone at work, am I the problem? Reply To: When I can’t stand anyone at work, am I the problem?

Allison Russo

This reply was originally posted by user Deja in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

One of the many questions that brought me to this sight tonight! As with much of my personal ADD experience, this seems to be an ongoing learning experience. I had heard/read many stories of people having a history of difficulties with co-workers and bosses, feeling judged, and losing jobs as a result of similar ADD symptoms. Having had a successful professional career for nearly 20 years, I thought I was blessed not to have experienced such doubt and turmoil. However, I am now on my 6th job in 5 years, I am asking myself the same kind of question.

I enter a job with high spirits, lots to add, and a positive attitude. My co-workers and supervisors praise my skills and abilities, compliment me on results, even give me raises and promotions. After about 5-6 months, however, things become more like what you have described. I take every question as a slight or judgment on my performance, and feel defensive. I don’t believe my work has changed (productivity, quality, how I go about it) but I feel very frustrated. Truly wondering if it is me or “them”.

I love my work and even most of the people. I just can’t stand the feeling of being constantly examined, questioned and judged or that I have to be ready to defend my work at all times. That said, I am just realizing the repetitive pattern indicates that I myself must be at least part of the problem. Only this morning told my doctor about it and committed to working on. I will try to keep you updated with whatever I learn or experience.