Reply To: ADD/ ADHD has destroyed my life.

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#196120
pax
Participant

I’m no risk taker. I took all my risks in my early years and nearly died so many times, and found my self so embarrassed so many times, that I have permanently shut down risk taking. I do nothing dangerous or adventurous, and keep my mouth closed as much as possible. I just have constant anxiety, a deep abiding depression, self-loathing and no hope for a brighter future. Yay!!

The only difference a diagnosis has given me so far is the knowledge that I probably did the best I could with the brain and knowledge I had.

Other than that, medication for depression stops me falling into complete despair.

I assume it is eventually accepting this about ourselves and learning to not hate ourselves after, for me, a life of self-hatred, which is all but impossible to shake off in your 50s.

I’m still waiting for a psychiatrist to write a script for a stimulant. But this forum seems to scream out meds don’t do much. So, probably just anti-depression meds for the rest of my life.