Reply To: Counseling/PCIT not going well

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Penny Williams

PCIT can be great for kids with ADHD, with the right counselor as your guide. You need someone experienced with ADHD and behavior issues. Some of what you’ve been doing in PCIT is great (the play) but some I advise against, like time-outs. Expecting a child with ADHD to listen to avoid consequences or punishment is futile. Especially at age 7 when he has little to no self-regulation yet. I lean heavily on Ross Greene’s work and approach, as well as Mona Delahooke.

We’ve actually had a great experience with a trauma-focused therapist. We all experience some traumas in life and kids with differences experience trauma more (trauma isn’t just abuse or victimization, it’s the way something is experienced by the individual).

I’ve also begun interweaving my coaching work with polyvagal theory — realizing that behavior is driven by how we process everything around us and is physically driven as well. Understanding the autonomic nervous system helps us understand our kids so much better.

Your parenting mindset is also a big piece of the puzzle.

ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Coach, Podcaster & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism