So here’s the point… Do I keep believing someday a miracle will happen? and I will learn how to organised or is this just believing that I can become neurotypical in some sense. Do I keep bloody believing or do I just give myself a break and accept that I have never been able to do it and never will and work on being ok with that? Is this admitting defeat? Is it ok to do so? I cannot stress enough have the mess impacts on me mentally. I don’t know what to do next!!
I struggle to be functional too and I have been having your dialog internally for a number of years now.
I try to push my way through and create a sort of inflated ego or mentality of “I can do it this time! I know I can! I’m smart and capable!”
Never happens. Reality slams me again and again. I then get depressed.
I have found some internal peace in accepting who I am and that this is how it will be.
You are right to ask those questions. We are not, and never will be neurotypical.
Medications help to a degree, but will not make you neurotypical.
I don’t think of it as defeat. Just a realignment of self image and reality.
The reason I replied is that the other replies are what I have heard and tried my whole life with no success.
I think there is some sort of toxic optimism. Till the grave!
Have some realistic optimism.
Be real with who you are and how you have functioned throughout your life. That can be painful, but I have found it even more painful to dream otherwise.
Do seek out some medication. It has helped me when I been able to get a prescription before. No cure though