Reply To: Losing it


So many great descriptions of what it is like to live like this. I’m curious whether being in the pandemic has made a difference for people?

My life now has fewer demands and so layers of stress are removed, for now. My basic ADD patterns remain, however, and get worse when I am feeling lost due to the lack of an external schedule. Naturally my own efforts at creating a schedule are a non-starter.

Many good suggestions have been given above. I want to share what often works for me. I do have piles/bowls at the door or jammed into my purse, but need a special large note at the alarm setting box reminding me to put in the ‘flipper’ with my artificial tooth (have been caught without it and smiled/talked tightly in stores). Mask and gloves are in purse, plus spares in car.

Related to this, I visualize my house as having streams in which items flow from room to room. Each room has an area to put things enroute elsewhere, and I grab them when going to the next /room/station. Eventually it gets to the destination room and maybe even the correct location. This has eliminated some of the creative placements.

My best tactic is similar to others’ use of breathing, calming, non-blaming, but is based on my childhood religious training, now long lapsed. I have made friends with St.Francis, patron saint of lost items. When I urgently need to find something, I tell him how important it is and ask for his help. I put my trust in him and know that he will guide me to find it sooner or later. If it is urgent, I keep looking and talking to him about where it might be, has been before, and what alternatives might be available. This takes the load off my shoulders, lets me feel supported rather than blamed, and pushes me to find other ways to proceed (locate spare key, do without the item for now, get my daughter’s copy, set up a better routine for placing item, or just go). Of course I express my gratitude when the item does turn up and reinforces my trust that I can cope and it will be ok.
I will deny this if my family or friends were to suspect that I do this. Other options might include the Goddess, God, or Jimi Hendrix, depending on your own experiences. Externalizing the help when I feel so helpless is the key. And of course I know it is all me, but I’ve gotten to enjoy having St.F around.

Sometimes I use this to find lost names and such, tho I have more faith in my brain to supply it, given time.