Yep, sounds like a bit of PTSD. I have PTSD from childhood medical trauma. It’s hard to get people to understand or acknowledge my issues because it’s not rape or war. They say things like “stop being unreasonable, there’s nothing to fear…doctors are there to help you.” I don’t understand how people can have such blind faith in doctors and the healthcare system! All they’ve every done is harm me, make me sicker and financially stressed out! I just started working with a therapist and was being pushed towards SSRI meds which are crazy scary to me, so that was causing more anxieties. Along the way, my therapist noticed many ADHD symptoms and evaluated me. Luckily the psychiatrist we are working with for ADHD meds respected my fears about medical treatment and long-term drugs like SSRIs. She agreed I should try other things first and will probably have better success than with SSRIs. She says the ADHD meds should give me the ability to dismiss my obsessive, recurring thoughts from the PTSD. She says I should be able to get more control over my life and finally be able to pursue yoga, meditation and relaxation techniques I’ve felt helpful, but I couldn’t manage to stick with. She has also recommended I consider EMDR – an eye movement desensitization technique to address the traumatic memories. It may sound a little hoaky, but it’s scientific and supposed to be very effective. They claim it can make a huge change in as little as 3 sessions. I’m just frustrated with how long it’s taking to make progress. I’m so ready to get the ADHD meds figured out, start functioning and working towards relief!