This was so crazy to read for my because your story is about as identical to mine as it gets, from being diagnosed at 10, medicated for a couple of years and then going off it due to loss of appetite and zombie like personality – that’s exactly how my family described it. I graduated high school okay but massively underachieved and frustrated my family in the process. Potential was always the word because I always did so well on standardized testing but couldn’t concentrate or get assignments done. I took 6 years to do my 4 year uni course and dragged my feet through the early years causing me to repeat units due to not handing things in, but once the content was addressing my areas of passion and interest, I was top of the class. My self worth went out the window because I thought for so long that I was lazy and essentially useless.
Finally just after my 25th birthday, I got re-diagnosed as an adult and prescribed Vyvanse. It has changed my life but I completely relate to the bad habits, coping mechanisms and anxiety that untreated ADHD fostered over the years and the issues it has left me with. I really struggled for a while and sometimes still do with the thought of “I wonder what I could have achieved or where I would be if it had been managed my whole life” but I know I’m exactly where I’m meant to be. I still have SO much work to do on myself but I am finally seeing some of my potential realised because I have found a career I’m so passionate about and am getting the help I need.
Good luck and thanks for sharing your story – it’s good to know that there’s people out there who can relate so much to your experiences and feelings.