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I came to the conclusion that I most likely have ADHD, and my mother too. She has always been a bit of a whirlwind, highly emotional and very creative, very obsessed with her work (teacher), messy and disorganized and living life on adrenaline. She got diagnosed with ME and fibromyalgia about 10 years ago and was pretty ill with it at first. She has calmed down a lot in some ways, and has managed to spend more time on herself (before it was all about others). Her ME and FM symptoms are now reduced a lot, but can still over do it and feel ill sometimes.
I think she should seek ADHD diagnosis, and I have decided I want to as well.