I have been married 32years and you have just described my marriage. In an effort to save my marriage, at my wife’s insistence, I went by myself for what I thought would be marriage counseling. One year and three therapists later, I was diagnosed with ADHD. This was last week.I cannot tell you what a rollercoaster of emotions I have gone through since then. Some good, some not so good. My therapist suggested I visit ADDitude.com. Finally I have discovered answers and reasons for all the things I thought were “wrong” with me. And equally as important, the hell I have put my wife through all these years. I encourage your husband to at least go on this website and to be totally honest with what he is all about. I’m not sure what path of treatment I will take, and I don’t know if it will save my marriage, it will save me! P S I was brought up by parents who believed any type of therapy was for crazy people. I wish I had known better than to listen to such nonsense.