For the record, it in no way takes two to destroy a marriage. One person consistently acting without good faith, being emotionally (or otherwise) abusive can do that fairly easily. It takes two people to make a marriage work, and if one of the people involved isn’t trying or is more interested in blame than in making things good for both of them, then no amount of work by the other person will help.
I think it’s actively toxic to assume it takes two to destroy a marriage, because that relies on the idea that marriages are easy and work on their own if even one person is trying, when actually à good marriage is like singing a good duet: beautiful, satisfying, and impossible if one of the singers refuses to learn the song or is constantly off key.
This is not your fault OP. You’re doing your best, but one person acting alone in good faith can’t save a relationship. I know; I spent 12 years trying myself.
- This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by Mnemoscat.