You really need to put yourself first and leave that relationship. This is not just ADHD you are describing, it is a mean person. No one has the right to shout at you, whatever their diagnosis.
It isn’t easy, I know as I’ve done it, but I can only say that the divorce day was the happiest of my life and I’ve found a new spouse who treats me respectfully and lovingly every day. I hope the same for you!