It’s an understandable response from a loved one, especially your mother. I too have trudged through many of the same struggles you have (albeit at 51, much longer) before I finally discovered the source of my issues. You’ll have to continue to educate those around you about how these medications can help. Essentially, people throwing road-blocks in front of you would rather see you continue to struggle than take a medication that can take away some of the fog associated with ADHD. A fog that only those with ADHD can fully appreciate.
I would also consider researching dyslexia, as over 50% of people with ADHD have some degree of dyslexia. After countless hours of research on ADD, I came to the realization that much of the difficulties I experienced in school were due to dyslexia. Dyslexia deals with difficulties with reading and writing, which transcends executive functioning, rote memory, etc – which are also key markers of ADHD/ADD. I have an IQ in the top 2%, but scored only a bit above average on standardized testing – and was nearly always the last person to turn-in their test. Was that because I couldn’t focus due to ADD, or because I couldn’t make sense of what I was reading due to dyslexia? Upon much reflection and introspection, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s a little of both for me – probably a mild to medium case of each. They both have their challenges and distinguishing them is difficult, but having the knowledge one way or the other is valuable information for you as a person.
I would also recommend watching some Gary Vaynerchuk videos about living your own life. Gary swears like a sailor, but speaks truth. He speaks of regret in many of his videos – which is a powerful reminder to all of us to keep searching, keep experiencing and keep living our own lives.