Reply To: Does anyone else self-sabotage?

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#128258
Dangada
Participant

Hey-

My name is Dan and I am 57 and was diagnosed a few years ago with ADHD and yes…I have been sabotaging and punishing myself for years. I have been told by many that I’m way too hard on myself, and I have very low self esteem nowadays. I’d do anything to be a “normie” and be able to get over minor setbacks without going “dark”. I’ve had a pretty successful career but I recently sold my company because I was spent. Needed a change. I got change alright…I’m having trouble finding work and I’ll do just about anything to have a reason to get up each morning. All of this idle time is bad for me. I know I did the right thing to sell my company, but now I’m ruminating if I sold it too fast or for too little. I often believe that I deserve this way of life and it’s hard to climb out of the gutter. I’m married but separated for a year now and living in a tiny studio apartment like some twentysomething. I own my house free and clear where my wife lives, I have no debt and plenty of money in my bank and retirement accounts but I’m the loneliness and saddest I’ve ever been in my life. I am blessed with good health, and many other things but yet I cant seem to enjoy any of it. I’m afraid I’ll never learn to be happy or have close friends again…