Reply To: Child behaviour fracturing family

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Parents Child behaviour fracturing family Reply To: Child behaviour fracturing family

#124743
Dizzy
Participant

Violet, I appreciate the kind words, but in my case it’s not so much the
age, but the mileage. As for the story, my family has been after me to
write a book about it. Might happen “someday”, but in the meantime if
my life experience can of help to someone else, then I’m happy to share
what I can.

Here’s the highly abridged version:

If I recall correctly (odds are good) I was diagnosed at age 7 or 8, and
did take Ritalin for several years, and it helped tremendously with my
school work, etc. At around 12 years old I asked my parents if I could
stop taking it. I know it made me “different”, and I wanted to go through
life being the “real me”, and I’d just have to learn how to overcome
the challenges.

The next 40 years were rather tumultuous.

Started taking medication for the ADHD again about 2011.

If there was anything I could change in life, I’d go get those 40 years back,
and would never stop taking medication. If I had, without question my life would have
been far different due to being able to think through a decision before a [usually wrong]
choice was made.

Odds of that happening aren’t too great, but then again, I can still be a dreamer. 🙂

My feelings on it were that the rest of the world could care less if I’m ADHD,
or not, so I best learn how to find ways to overcome my issues if I’m going to
have any chance for success. Did OK in some areas, and in others it was a complete
crash-n-burn.

Hopefully, you and her dad can agree to some type of punishment for the bad behavior.
I’m not taking “corporal” punishment at all, but a “time out”, or losing a favorite
object for a week or two. I believe what’s most important in all of it is that she
knows and understands why she is being punished. She will learn that her bad actions
have consequences, and appropriate/good behavior is rewarded. As she gets older, those
“bad action” consequences that life dishes out will be much more serious. She needs
to begin learning her “behavior boundaries” now, as it will definitely be much more
difficult to establish those boundaries when she reaches teenage years.

Gonna repeat what I suggested in my first post:

You’ve got a lot on your plate right now, so remember that you can’t go
through life walking on egg shells all the time with hopes of not upsetting
anyone. Make the time to take care of yourself!