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You seem to tick off many symptoms of ADHD. Like you said folks on here aren’t psychiatrists and neither am I. HOWEVER you don’t necessarily have to fit every symptom to have ADHD. In fact (for example) some folks with ADHD have a specific place for things BECAUSE they lose them a lot. That doesn’t mean for them they are organized because they are punctual and conscientious. It means they show organization because otherwise they will lose belongings all the time.
I would seek for a psychiatrist who has experience in treating patients with ADHD and who has good rating with it too.
Don’t worry man. We’re all struggling on here, some of us even undiagnosed just now learning about ADHD. I wouldn’t be very quick to beat myself up over something like this. Seek professional help and get different opinions. You could have ADHD that’s made worse by other comorbid disorders such as depression or anxiety. Or you could have issues like anxiety and depression CAUSED by ADHD. It’s not always about one or the other. Sometimes it’s two issues or more. Sometimes it’s ADHD but presents itself similarly to other disorders.
Best of luck!