Home › Welcome to the ADDitude Forums › For Adults › Emotions & Shame › After being perscribed adderall for 10 years. Today my doctor drug tested me. › Reply To: After being perscribed adderall for 10 years. Today my doctor drug tested me.
I’ve been going to the same practice for ten years, and today I was given a form saying I had to consent to random drug testing to continue to receive my ADHD medication. I wasn’t targeted specifically. Apparently, it’s a new policy. After signing it, I sat in my car in the parking lot for a while, disillusioned. Not because I’d fail a test (I’m an unadventurous 40 year old dad with nothing to hide) but because a bit of my dignity was just stripped away. And I just can’t shake it off. Being drug monitored is humiliating. It’s inherently based on mistrust. It causes unnecessary anxiety. What if I didn’t take my meds that day? What if the test results get screwed up? My gut reaction is to stop the meds altogether and walk away. My wife is trying to talk me out of it.
For her part, she has a point. The medication gave me the support I needed to get my life on track. I went from someone who had trouble finding work to a small business owner & employer with a family and a relatively full life. She thinks I should just accept it, but I feel like I jump through enough policy hoops for treatment. Living like I’m on some kind of criminal probation seems like a step too far.
I feel like I can’t even talk reasonably about it with my doctor either. Questioning the practice of drug monitoring? Drug seeker! Looking for a different doctor who doesn’t require testing? Drug seeker! This is madness. I feel stigmatized by my own doctor for having a condition I was reluctant to seek treatment for in the first place. Doctors, do you even care that this is becoming the norm? Is anybody in the community speaking up for their patients?