Thanks for your response. I guess what I’m stStruggling with is adhd vs defiant behaviour. Ie the reason younger doesn’t wash hand is because shit (excuse) isn’t dirty, or bringing his bird downstairs and letting it poop on the couch. What I’m saying is, is that everything is attended to when something is in it for them. Like when they are called back downstairs to clean their plate after dinner, I’m told I’m petty because it was two feet away and I could have done it. I’m talking about electing to take seatbelts off while enroute even though they know physical and financial consequences if something were to happen. I’m talking about straight A students when they elect to hand in the work and lying about not having homework to do. I understand the hyperactivity, inattentiveness, lapses in time and subsequent bad time management. But surely not all I’ve mentioned above is a result of ADHD? How do you differentiate and then how do you discipline considering the ADHD?