Thank you for sharing this and I sincerely hope you have been free to move on in the past few days. I left my job (also had been there just over a year) and would describe my former manager exactly as you described your (former?) manager. I decided it was better to risk my very limited savings than my emotional health and having a breakdown and not being able to support my children long term. In the past 10 years I’ve had what would look to most like a fantastic career, but adult ADHD and anxiety disorder have a funny way of following me now, no matter what… with spectrum issues, our bosses and work environments condition us more than they teach us anything. We’re conditioned for reaction, for rejection, for staying a step ahead at every moment and anticipating severe consequences for things others would find a way to laugh off. And even with a great boss now, it follows me. But she lets me be honest about what I’m experiencing and so far my risk paid off. I make way, way, way less now but my old job allowed me to pay down a lot of bills I’d struggled with (which is why I’d stayed at the high stress job, tbh.) It was a risk I hadn’t taken before and maybe can’t ever take again in my life but it was that or get fired by someone who made it known whatever risk I was taking for the job wouldn’t be worth it.
Hope you’re doing better today. Made my daily sit on the struggle bus a lot less lonely. 🙂