Just wanted to add – I feel like another factor is upbringing. My husband’s parents were super strict and feel like their children are a reflection of themselves, so they were never willing to let my husband “fail”, because they thought it would make them look bad. So they bailed him out, did things for him that he should have done himself, and set him up in life with what they wanted him to have. Then once he was on his own, it all started falling apart. I feel like he still on some level feels like someone “should” be looking after him (although he would vehemently deny that!!)