To Mommymaniac1963. Thanks for your time. Sadly, there are barriers to most ideas. My wife absolutely refuses to see any doctor, or even take the kids to one or visit me in hospital after heart surgery. Three times I did a deal with her, offering her huge bonuses to encourage her, but each time she took my offer then backed out. Support for mental health issues round here is dismal, so they simply refused to meet me or my son. So I can’t get a diagnosis and she would refuse to accept it. If I could find a way to get meds, she would tell me they were useless, after throwing them in the bin, as before. But I now know that her endless attacks are aspergers meltdowns, totally out-of-control, so she is only raving to hurt me, and has no memory of what she said by next day. I have NEVER had a serious conversation with her ….. it simply triggers a huge violent meltdown within 20 seconds. I am a science professor, and she has never done a single assignment or homework or passed any real exam, but she tells me I am the stupidest man in the world, and she is much smarter than me. So I see no way forward, now, but the kids will go to university soon and I need to find another partner. She is destroying all of us. Any more ideas?