All the time… and it hurts so bad every single time. People tell me I am very smart, and gifted, but those are think which bring me to same inner storm every time. I can’t trust myself. I cant avail my own brain when and how I want. Worst I feel threaten my own inner Captain. I lost that an ID card one 4 days before boarding an international flight, I misplaced eyeglasses, cellphone, jacket. I even twice my Macbook Air in a random public place. But thanks to people and my good angel, some goo souls brought it back to me. I live eventually in a contance fear to mess up again, andmost people fail to understand it. One bunch would say be more careful and pay more attention which hurt and makes only things worst inside my poor head which pay attention as much as it can. But its never enough. There is the other bunch of people who do not understand what we mean when try to explain the emotional trauma and the pain it left in our wrecked heart. When we explain our existential anxiety they point our past success and high performances as if it was no big deal and no reason to make such a big deal..
I feel you. I understand you… I cry with you. But so far did not find the answer to that. Still working hard in self-acceptance.. Good luck to us