Well I definitely have depression too. And when I stop smoking sometimes ALL my thoughts go negative. And that is usually worse at night. If I smoke I start to talk, observe, and have more neutral/curious thoughts instead of negative ones.
And yes, I don’t smoke until I’m done with work. If I’m at the office I’ll have plenty of energy and feel good. When I’m working from home things are very variable.
I’m not sure about needing it to enjoy things, that doesn’t really strike a chord with me. Well, I suppose I have recognized that I’ll struggle to enjoy relaxation- I won’t enjoy TV shows, I won’t be present when spending time with my boyfriend. Stuff like that. I’d love to hear your thoughts!