Reply To: Newly diagnosed ADHD and behavior problems.

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I have four children and all of them have ADHD. My two oldest son’s 27 and 24 were diagnosed at age 5, put on medication and we did counselling for years. I did what the counselor said about discipline and it didn’t do any good. We did charts, time out, take things away, grounded them, my ex husband even spanked them, I didn’t like that and I didn’t want him to do that. They have been on their own for several years, now. I currently have a 15 yr old son and 8 year old daughter both ADHD. I don’t do things like I did before with them. I took all the things I knew didn’t work before and even asked my older son’s advice on things. Yelling doesn’t help it makes things worse. When there is an issue with something I talk with them. I made a list with all the rules and went over it with the kids. I explained the consequences if the rules were broke. We negotiated what they would be. I do a lot of positive talk to them. Being told that you do bad things all the time, doesn’t help, makes things worse. If they do something bad, we talk about why they did it and how to correct the problem. My oldest son likes to pick on his sister, he thinks its funny. My daughter would get freaked out, yelling and crying. I started going to him when he would do it and say, oh you want my attention and hug him. He didn’t like that at all and he quit doing it. I make it my business to ask my kids daily if they had a good day at school. If things are ok and if they need to talk about anything. I haven’t had any problems with them and they don’t have problems at school.